Dealing With Divorce
QUESTION: Why is dealing with divorce so difficult?ANSWER:Dealing with divorce proves difficult for many reasons stemming from the physical roller coaster ride of emotions, finances, rejection, failure, and loss. Difficulties arise in divorce requiring both spouses to deal with what's left of a shattered dream.
Some more strenuous difficulties will arise if the marriage was filled with abusive acts. Whether the abused partner is the wife or husband, the abused must seek safety to start thinking rationally and gain inner healing.
Lack of finances may also affect both partners after divorce. Wives may opt to leave everything behind to get out of a bad marriage. Husbands may find themselves locked out of the home for which his hard work financed. Stability is all swept away through divorce.
Children are another aspect affecting the recovery from divorce. Providing for a stable environment for the children increases the amount of stress. A tendency many divorced people fall into is playing mind games against the ex-spouse by using the children as pawns to strike back with hurtful spite. This tendency unthinkingly causes long-term negative effects on the children.
If you are seeking recovery from divorce, practical steps can be taken to aid in your emotional and physical well-being:
- Eat well-balanced meals.
- Take daily multi-vitamins. Vitamins maintain the health of the body's cells, as they cope with the stress to which you are subjected.
- Do not use alcohol or drugs.
- Seek counseling help from a local church or counselor.
As I traveled through the difficulties of divorce, I found great comfort in reading the Bible. Initially, the words brought me hope to grasp onto. As I strove to forget the past and put it behind me, my healing has deepened. I've learned to unlock all the doors memory to the painful memories of my past. It was easier to do than I originally thought. I want to let you know that the sun does shine again after divorce. In your quiet moments, let these next few words be in front of you to meditate upon. May they comfort the tumult that rages inside your soul?
"The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit" God will revive your inner being so that the sun will shine for you again (Psalm 34:18).
"Thou tellest my wanderings: put thou my tears into thy bottle: are they not written in thy book?" (Psalm 56:8 (KJV). God created tears as a language; therefore He understands them. It is okay to cry and is part of the inner healing process.
"Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall" (Psalm 55:22).
God can work in your situation for the good. It takes time for Him to work around all the decisions, wrong or right, that people make during these difficult and trying times. Patience is pivotal in the healing process, and healing doesn't come overnight.
Will God still love me even though I'm divorced? Most assuredly! Romans 8:38-39 says, "For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come. Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord" (KJV).
